Becoming Authentic (3 of 4)

Mike Connell

Page 6 of 10
So your feelings or tensions in your body, some people clench their jaw or clench - you watch people, watch yourself most of all. Begin to discover what you're doing and it'll tell you what's going on in your inner world. The other time you can start to discover what's happening is as you pray. You're praying about your journey, you're praying about situations in your life and as you're praying in tongues and you begin to picture those things you begin to feel and become aware of things. Try to name what you feel because how many people have had an experience like this: you really felt a reserve or something, no peace about something but you didn't say anything and later on it turned out it was real bad? How many have had that experience? We've pretty well all had that. Well why didn't we listen to the inner thing? See we tend to live life at the surface and in the head rather than actually in the heart and spirit.

If you're going to be a spirit person you have to learn to examine what you feel, what's going on in your inner life and it's not that you focus on it, it's just you label it and name it so you then know what to do with it. Otherwise you'll do what a lot of people do, oh, going to push it down, stuff it down. Well after you've had years of stuffing down your body breaks down. Bodies break down because unforgiveness grew into resentment and bitterness and then the body became poisoned. After a while physically they got sick, so some people have got arthritis right through their body and the core prime reason is they've accumulated bitterness and resentment. They never dealt with anything; oh, I just moved on or I got over it. No, you didn't get over it, it's manifesting in your body. I've prayed for so many people and the moment, the moment they came to a place of recognising their anger and resentment and unforgiveness and forgave, immediately the spirit tormenting them was able to be cast out and they were instantly healed.

So your body signals what's going on in your inner life as does your feelings, so you've got to learn to connect with them. What am feeling? What am I sensing? Sometimes you just feel I feel a bit off. What does it mean, off? I just feel a bit down. How long have you been feeling like that? So the first thing is become aware of what you feel and how you're behaving, so for example you see someone and then you look away. Why did they look away? What did I feel? Oh, felt like upset. What do you mean upset? Actually angry. Oh okay, you're angry. How long have you been angry with that person? Can you understand? So your behaviours and your emotions will trigger what you really believe and what's really going on in your heart and if we don't observe our behaviours and notice what we're feeling, identify and search for what's going on, we'll never grow.

We'll never discover what we believe and where our belief system is totally at variance with what God's word says could be ours. A person for example who's experienced a lot of pain of rejection, they've got a lot of emotions inside, grief and stuff they've never resolved and they begin to believe after a while well no one ever wants me. They walk into a church, walk into any group, someone looks the other way and immediately they feel rejected. It triggers off their belief - oh I knew it, I knew it, there's no love in this place. Now they're starting to get wound up and angry and walking down the street fuming about the church - but it was never about the church. It was actually a lot of unresolved stuff and when the feeling came up they just got into an old bad habit and never dealt with it.

The country's full of immature Christians doing all this kind of stuff. Someone thinks different, does a bit differently, next thing you know they're all wound up and got an attitude and there's [fear 00.25.48] - all kinds of stuff going on. Gossip goes around. You've got to be bigger than that. You've got to grow bigger! Don't stay little. If we're going to be a bigger church you've got to grow a bigger person. We've all got to grow bigger so we've got to look at out inner world and grow, so first thing is become aware of what you're feeling and what you're doing; second is ask questions. Ask yourself some questions; what's going on? What's going on in here? Why am I doing what I'm doing? What am I feeling? See, how long have I been feeling that? Why am I feeling that? What am I doing? What's going on inside? See, if I'm avoiding someone well why am I avoiding them, what is that all about?