Here's the core of the problem. In Proverbs 4:23 it says, guard your heart with all diligence, because whatever you believe in your heart, is going to flow out in the rest of your life, so what counts is what you believe in your heart. If you have a judgement in your heart, that formed when you were younger, I'm unlovable, I'm of no value, I have to work hard or I'll never make it; if you have judgements in your heart about yourself, those judgements will sit there, and demons will use them and continually torment them, until you break your agreement with those things.
You are of great value. You are loved. The Bible says nothing can separate you from the love of God and Jesus Christ, nothing, nothing. Failure, nothing! Jesus paid for all your failures. Disappointments, nothing! Nothing can keep you from the love of God. Nothing will cause God to change His mind about you. Nothing you do - well you don't understand, I've done this or I had an abortion, I had this. No, no, no. Nothing you can do, will change God's view of you! He is love. He loves you unconditionally. He wants you to be filled with that love. Don't listen to the lies of condemnation. Don't listen to the judgements in your heart. Learn to recognise the voice that comes from God, the voice that comes from demonic spirits pushing you down and depressing you, because the moment you start down the track of beginning to start to doubt that God loves you, to doubt the reality of His care for you, to doubt the reality of His watching over you - as soon as you go down that track, then depression and all kinds of things come around. Then you're looking for a way out of the pain.
Now listen, you don't have to live like that. You can live differently. We're called to live differently. We're called to live, and walk, and enjoy the love of God, and it tells us some simple keys in there how to do it. It all has to do with you believing. It tells us you beloved, you're different, so praying in Holy Ghost, praying in the spirit, praying in tongues is a great gift to energise, and make your spirit man come alive, so you are aware of the Holy Spirit, because when you're praying in tongues, the Bible tells us your spirit is praying, the Holy Ghost is rising up inside you. The spirit of God is expressing through you, so every time I pray in tongues, I'm aware the spirit of God is with me, and if I pray in tongues, my spirit will start to arise above the conflicts of the soul.
So number one, you need to start to do some time with God, and these are the sorts of things you can do, very simply. You spend time praying in the spirit. Secondly, you begin to meditate on what God says about you. Imagine it, what it would feel like to have God with you, loving you, being near to you. I took some weeks imagining the reality of God with me, God near me, His friendship to me. I just took time to imagine it. I didn't feel anything except a bit stupid at first, and if I'd stopped when I felt stupid, I'd have never have come to where I have in life now. Someone had said a great thing to me. They said if you knew that by pushing against this problem and resolving it, your life would change, wouldn't it be worth it?
I've looked all over. I've ministered all over New Zealand, but one of the most common problems I find right through New Zealand is simply this: people struggle with rejection, and believing they're unlovable, and when they give way to those thoughts and emotions ,they become depressed, lose connection with God, and then they just become religious. We've got to know and walk in the reality, I am loved by my Father. So how can it happen? Well I took time to meditate in it, so for probably three to four weeks, every day I'd rise up, pray in tongues, speak and declare those demons are defeated, and then meditate that God loves me, and His presence is with me, and I would meditate and meditate. I'd imagine standing there, and God is with me, all the love that I would feel. I began to meditate in those things. You know what? It took me about three to four weeks, and then one day, I suddenly experienced God's love in the most very powerful way. It started to flow over my life, through me. I broke down and wept and wept and I had an encounter and experience with God, so I've practised re-meditating on that regularly.