Hopefully we really believe that, and the Ten Commandments are no different. When you look at the Ten Commandments, most of them are easy to buy into: don't have any other Gods. Alright, check. Don't have idols in your house, check. Remember the Sabbath day, keep it holy, check. Don't use God's name in vain, check. Don't kill people - alright, that's a pretty good plan. Don't steal - alright, that sounds right. Don't commit adultery - well alright, that sounds okay. Don't lie - well alright.
But when it comes to “honour your father and your mother”, somehow we make that conditional - as if God didn't know your story; and God does know my story. What we have to believe is that: God's way, and God's plan, is the best, regardless.
I think we missed it, just in a basic definition of terms. Let me give you three things that honour is not - that sometimes we confuse as being honourable.
1) Honour is not: ignoring wrong things.
I have a counselling background, so I've had people in my office, and they can't come to admit that: the way they grew up was dysfunctional. They can't say: this was destructive - they can't say that! The reason they can't say it is, somewhere deep down inside of them, they really believe that: if they admit that, somehow they're dishonouring their parents.
Honour is not ignoring it, like it didn't happen. Honour is not that! Actually the honourable thing, at some point, is to actually sit back and admit: this was wrong. Honour is not ignoring wrongs.
2) Honour is not: saying that wrong things are right.
The very next step, once I ignore wrongs, I start thinking that: what is wrong, is actually right. The huge risk is this: to create a new normal. We create a new normal; so our family is running around thinking we are normal, and everyone else is weird. That's crazy!
Whatever defines our normal, defines our life. Think about how TV has changed. One of the big reasons that the divorce rate has gone from 11% to 57% since 1967 is the feminist movement. The feminist movement took over Hollywood in 1967, and they were good-hearted people, I'm sure. What they were trying to do was probably try to help people; but this was their basic belief: women are more evolved than men. Women are therefore more complex, they're more evolved; and so men need to grow up and be like women.
They said: women receive love by love; and men receive love by respect (because they're Neanderthals). But if they were actually more evolved, they would actually learn to receive love by love; and if everybody is receiving love by love, then that will help everybody get along better, because we're all talking the same language. That was their thought.
They were dead wrong. God designed men to receive love by respect. God designed women to receive love by love. The command in the Bible is for husbands to love their wives; but the command in the Bible is for wives to respect their husbands. God does not have to command women to love their husbands, because women love naturally. God does not have to command men to respect their wives, because men respect naturally. God has to command us to do the things that don't come naturally.
So they took over the TV, and they did exactly what Hitler did to Germany. Hitler took over Germany by propaganda, and they changed the characters on TV. Think about the TV shows in the '50s and '60s: Father Knows Best, Ozzie and Harriet, Leave It to Beaver. In all of those family comedies, all of the comedy surrounded the teenager in the home, or the kid in the home; and at the end of the 22 minute show, the genius father comes in and saves the day. That's how it was.
They changed that in 1967. In 1967 they wanted men to change, so they started making men look retarded on TV; and all of a sudden the main characters on TV were: Archie Bunker; Homer Simpson; Hank (the guy from the King of the Hill - of you weren't my son, I think I'd hug you - that guy); Al Bundy (from Married with Children); Kevin James (from King of Queens). Think about these guys - John Goodman from Roseanne - think about how they started portraying the American family, and they portrayed it as normal.