If you were to make a decision, that wherever you go this week, you take an interest in people - connect with them in just a very positive way, then enquire about: where are you, what's happening, what's going on? I notice you look a bit sad - what's up? If you were to just take that line - now don't try and fix anything - just take the line: that I want to draw near to people, and position myself with a heart that is interested, and cares to just ask them some questions about how they're doing. How are you doing? What's happening?
That's all I did with this girl in the book shop: hey, how are you doing? From the way she answered, I could tell something was going on - the feeling in the answer. I said: you just seem to be sad, what's happening? She started to tell me, and then that gave the doorway in, to then help her and comfort her. She walked away totally changed. You can do it, but you've got to get into the person's heart
Ask questions - draw out the feelings that they have. What are you sad about?
In Luke 24:17, that's what Jesus said - what's going on? I noticed you're down, you're heavy. What's happening there? So help people.
People often need help to identify what they feel, and put some words on it. They need ‘soul words’.
If you ask a guy what he's feeling, he'll say nothin'! How are you feeling? Nothin'! So you ask a guy tell me what kind of feelings you have? Well... angry - very angry, that's it, you know? A lot of men are not in tune to connect with feelings, people just need help to put words to the feelings. Just, this is what you feel - oh you're feeling sad? You're feeling upset? Feeling angry? Oh no, I feel hurt, and a little bit angry? Just find a way to draw out of people what's going on; because if you don't do that, then they don't actually share - they don't feel you've understood them at all.
I can remember sitting in a place, a woman asked me for help: her husband had just had an accident on a work site. One of the guys had been electrocuted, and she was upset; so I listened and found out what the problem was, and gave an answer, but she didn't want to hear it. I gave it again, she still didn't want to hear, and I thought: this is a waste of my time.
Then the Lord spoke to me, He said: “you're not even listening”; so whether your answer is right or wrong is irrelevant. She doesn't feel you heard her. She didn't want an answer; she actually wanted to be heard. I thought: oh, my male thing - a ‘fix it’ thing, you know? So I just changed mid-talk, and said: I guess you're feeling quite afraid over what the consequence of this would be? Then out it all came, and once she'd shared it, she knew exactly what to do, and she was fine. I didn't even need to give her anything much more than that.
3) Guide them (if it's possible at that point, and it isn't always possible) - to trust God.
That's where your testimony comes in - where you can share how God helped you: this is how God helped me. Someone this week was in a great distress, and I just texted them a verse, and they replied: this put strength in me - I've moved past that text, and I'm down into this part of it now. I just sent a text - that's all it took. Thinking of you, care about you in this distress. Sent the text, sent a verse, and was able to make a connection in a very simple way.
I was with Pastor Kong, and Pastor Kong's going through a tremendous stress related to the ministry, accusations being made. Now it all comes to Court, they're threatening him and six of his followers with years and years and years in jail. They just want to get rid of him. This is incredibly stressful - millions of dollars going in lawyer’s fees - it's a horrendous situation; but it's the making of a man of God! That's what it looks like - it looks horrible! He said: some people just don't want to come near me now. Some people avoid me. He said: some people think that if they're connected to me, their reputation will be tainted, and their ministry tainted. I said: well Kong - we're here with you, whatever happens. We've been on this journey too long to quit now - we're sticking with you, and we choose to stay with you, however it works out. We're with you, and for you, to do whatever we can to help. He said: can you bring me something from the Lord. I thought... and God just dropped something in - I had a scripture for him.