So the shame message is: damage, different and danger, and so we were not designed for this kind of thing. So the core message of shame we've said is damage, different and danger, but the next thing is, is there an emotion that comes with it, a motivation? When people - notice what Adam said. He said: I was afraid. Now what was he afraid of? He was absolutely filled with terror, and I know what that fear is like. This is what it is; it's the fear of being exposed. It's the fear that the lid will be taken off and there you are! Probably some of you have had dreams, and in your dreams you're naked in the middle of a crowd, and trying to find some way to escape. It's actually a shame thing talking to you. That's what it is, and the fear, the wanting to run away, can't get away, see? So we see there that fear, the fear of exposure, and then once you're exposed, then you'll be rejected or punished in some kind of way, so it's a driving fear inside people: if you could really see what I'm like, I'm terrified of what you'd do to me.
And see people just get covered in, and so the core strategy, how do people decide they'll fix it? Well you can see it with Adam and Eve.
They fixed it three ways: number one, they covered themselves so made fig leaves and covered themselves, literally got some coverings, put it over, now you can't see me. That was smart. Okay, fig leaves. Fig leaves meant a covering of self. The second thing they did was, they went into hiding. They actually hid themselves from genuine, authentic intimacy. This is ridiculous. I mean God comes there, and He's walking and talking with them, and then they take a hike, they hide away in the trees. Then when God was saying: where are you, He's not asking where are you like I don't know. He's actually saying: I know that my relationship with you has been breached, I'm coming looking to you. Will you talk to me about your condition? I wonder what would have happened if Adam had come out and said: Lord, I've just blown it, will You forgive me? It would have been totally different.
Here's the third part of shame then, we tend to blame everyone else, the final seal on it. Lord, that woman You gave me! In other words implicit in that is: listen, don't blame me! It's not my mess. Who thought up the idea of the woman aye? Come on. Come on. Who made the woman aye? [Laughter] Who brought her to me? And who's messed it all up for me? So don't talk - just talk to the hand, you know, it's You and the woman can sort this out. It's nothing to do with me, see? Of course you see, now he's not in the position now to actually take any responsibility. That's how he lost his dominion, he would not take responsibility for the things he could manage, so shame is an identity thief, it stops you being who you are; it is an intimacy thief, it stops you connecting in relationships, and it's a dominion thief, because it stops you taking responsibility to manage your world. It stops you being accountable, the blame game - be heaps of people here in the blame game.
I hear it. Every time I hear it, shame is talking, because the moment you blame someone else, you have made a decision not to be responsible for your life, to play the victim card, and this is not how we have dominion in life. To have dominion in life, we must be responsible, so becoming responsible for my thoughts, my emotions, my choices, my actions, is a part of having dominion, and shame will cause me to actually withdraw, and try and find someone somewhere to blame. Well it was Prime Minister, well it was the white people, well it was the Government, well it was the police, well it was my father, it was my mother, it was my background, it was the bottle. Whatever it was, listen: that stops you becoming responsible to build a different future. So there can be no place for shame in my personal life, nor can I tolerate it in my environment, and so in dealing with the issue of shame, we want to first recognise it.
Then we want to learn how we can overcome it personally, then of course since we live in an environment which is full of people shaming us, you've got to learn how to handle being shamed, and to also handle what you do with people. I even heard that expression this week: oh, shame on you! I thought where did that come from? My goodness me, that's straight out of hell. God has got no shame to put on people. He wants actually to restore us so we know how to walk, and if you fall over to get up quick without carrying shame. The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, though he fall, though he fall, though he fall, though he fall, though he fall, though he fall, he'll not stay down, cast down by shame, the Lord will lift him up - so God is committed to lift us up. Why? Because we're the apple of His eye! Why? Because He loves us. Why? Because He's not ashamed of us! He wants to lift us up, wants to get us up again!