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Curses and How to Deal with Them (4 of 5)

Mike Connell

Another cause of burdens on people, is where a parent fails, and becomes the child, and puts the weight or transfers the parenting to the child. It's called parental inversion, so for example a mother's an alcoholic, or a father's an alcoholic, and one of the children has to arise, and in every kind of respect they carry the parent's duties, except in the bed. Then there's what's called parental inversion.

Now what happens then is, the child loses their joy of childhood, and there's this burden placed on them, so I have found it helpful just to break that burden of responsibility, and lead them in a confession to release the burden, and then we just break that weight of expectation off them. The last one under that list there, is a code of silence or secrecy, which often happens in a family where there's been abuse of some kind, or there's dysfunction, and we don't talk, we don't tell anyone about our issues, or we don't talk outside family. What happens is, the person becomes burdened. It can happen in church, where someone makes someone be secret about the counsel, or secret about things. This is all a burden, so for example - and if you're a leader you can be trapped in it - someone comes to you and says I've got something terrible I've got to share with you, and I just want to know I can trust you, that you won't share it. Will you promise you won't tell anyone?

Now my alarm bells go off when someone says will you promise you won't tell anyone, because it's likely what they're going to tell me is going to be a problem for me, so I have to usually try and say - it's not the same since I'm a senior leader, but when I was working in church in a leadership level, I'd have to say listen, I will respect your confidentiality. However if it's a serious matter, and I felt it necessary to refer it to someone above me, I will do that, and you have to trust that I'll use good judgement over that. If you can't accept that, don't share it with me. Now sometimes the desire to be in the know, can cause you to lack discretion and protect yourself, so if that person had said to me: well promise me you won't tell the Pastor what I've done - okay, I promise. Now they tell me, and I think oh my God, they're the worship leader, or this or that, or the youth leader, and they're sleeping with this person, and they've just told me. What on earth am I going to do? So next time I see the Pastor I'm in trouble, because I've got this burden inside me, and I'm tormented by spirits, because now my relationship is fractured, I can't be open and transparent.

Now I'm not talking about good sensible confidentiality in counsel. We're talking about being put a burden of secrecy you can't keep. It just burdens you and I have some people come to me, said I've been sitting on this for six months, and it's just weighed me down. They tell me what happened, and they were caught in a situation like that, and we break the power of that agreement they made, release them from the bondage, command the spirit of death - because there's always a spirit of death around it - to leave it. Sometimes if someone's been abused, the abuser will tell them: you mustn't tell anyone, if you tell someone you'll be responsible for the family breaking up. [Inhales sharply] and so they're caught. I want to tell someone, I don't want the family to break up, ooh - and they're burdened, tormented by spirits, and it's a huge relief to be able to get that veil of silence. It's a very simple thing, in setting people free we need to recognise what the bondage is, let the person renounce the bondage, speak it off their life, and then we pray and break the power of the bondage; in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, I just break this bondage.

Okay, I've got a list of some details on that for you in the notes, on the How to Break Bondages. This afternoon we'll get into it and do some of it. How many of you, having gone through that teaching, would recognise that there are some areas of bondage that are sitting on your life? A soul tie? Just hand up and down - soul tie, ungodly soul tie, alright. A death wish, how many have got that sitting there around their life? Okay, some have got that. An inner vow of some kind? Okay, some have got that. Some bitter judgements against someone, against men, women, church, Government, authorities... let's go through it. It can go through against Maori, it can go through Pakeha, it can be racial in orientation, it's a judgement. It will always reproduce something. How many realise there's a judgement in their life around that area? Okay, quite a few. Alright then, what about words spoken, curses put over you, spoken over you, you're in agreement with? Okay, there's a few of them there, alright then.